FOURTEEN WEEKS

It is fourteen weeks today. i am missing my Love, it is woodworkers night, so he is away. i am also sorry to say that my breasts aren't as full as they should be today. We are going through some changes, stretching our relationship and ourselves. It has been fantastic, but also scary. With the scary, less milk. i did get hardly anything out today with my fingers. My Love called when i was trying this afternoon (because i emailed him and asked him to). It did help to hear his voice, but still didn't get much. He told me to relax and he would take good care of them and me as soon as he got home. yay me!!

Getting Back on Track

Vacation time is good, but it is also good to get back on our schedule. Finding time to be together is easier when we are in our groove. This week was good, but we missed our first morning session! Hubby's alarm didn't go off and we woke up after he should have been leaving. So, another day of me taking care of the girls.

We haven't had an increase in supply like we would like, but I am sure that is due more to our being off schedule and not taking enough time when we are together. There is always milk there, even just an hour after he has had a good long suckle, I get a squirt of milk if I try. We both enjoy the time together and I am just going to have to trust that when hubby decides he wants big mouthfuls of milk, he will up our sessions. Until then, I am going to just sit back and enjoy the time we do have together...even if it isn't as much as I would like. :)

On another note, he said that I am going to kill him this week. My sex drive has officially overtaken his, for the first time in our relationship. Usually, lately, I have started something with him, a bj or handjob and he has said, again, really? Then we suckle and by then I am so ready for him, I masturbate or ask for his fingers....yada, yada, yada a few minutes later, he is ready too! But last night, I even had my ass in the air, swaying back and forth and he said no! Later, he said he that it was more fun to tease me and turn me down!! Certainly, a first, but this morning he couldn't wait any longer. :)

Ups and Downs

We went away to a cabin in the woods for a couple of nights this week. I was thinking it would lead to more couple time, not less! Bad timing and having my in-laws around didn't help. Hubby has a stuffy nose and is finding suckling hard for any length of time. So, I spent more time alone with the girls then I do usually when we are both working! Ha, ha, so much for plans.

So, I think that supply is a bit down this week, the girls don't feel as tight. Hubby doesn't like to dissappoint, so he says it isn't, but I don't believe him. Oh well! Next week we will be back on schedule and I am sure we will just progress from here.

We have found that the backyard is a good alternitive to a hot house...suckling under the stars and a bright moon is amazing. Glad the bugs aren't too bad right now. :)

Eleven WEEKS

We have settled into a good routine, mornings, home from work and bed time. I am not a morning person, but I have been waking up before the alarm, ready for him to suckle. I love waking him up by rubbing a ready nipple over his lips and I am happy to say he is always ready to comply. I think I am craving it more then he does. Summer is so busy, and we missed the afterwork time yesterday, I was home late and he had somewhere to be. I don't mind my mid-morning break, but I don't like having to do it when it is his turn...

I did order a manual pump. I wasn't going to and I am not planning on using it a ton, but he leaves for over nights and I think that I might like to have it then. It was recommended on ANRSpace and I got it cheap on E-Bay. I am curious to see if I get very much with it. I never did with my boys expressing at work. But expressing at work sucks. Or doesn't ? (ha, ha). I hated doing it, I hated dealing with it and I missed my baby. This is different, so maybe it will work better.

I had really expected the post activities to begin to decrease, and they have a little bit. It isn't the same, new and so stimulating, but I am still finding myself ready for him once or twice a day... So, all in all, about the same there, too. It is different somehow. Not new, but just how we are now. More like is has always been this way. Wonder if it will always?

Questions my Husband will Grow Tired of

Do my boobs look bigger?
Do they feel heavy to you?
They feel heavy to me, do you think so?
Can you tell I am not wearing a bra?
Are you ready to suckle now?

As he is suckling (I try to ask yes or no, but sometimes I forget...)
Is there milk?
Is it sweet?
Does it taste like it did with the boys?
How much is there?
Is there a lot?
Is it a good amount?
Do you want there to be more?
How long do you think it will take for more milk?
Is she empty?
Did you suckle after she was empty?

Feeling Full

I had CPR training ALL day about and hour and a half away from home for work. Since it was an all day group activity, I didn't get the chance to take care of my girls, like I normally would during the work day. Let me tell you by the time I was doing chest compressions, my girls were so big and hard, it wasn't easy! When I finally got home and peeled off my bra, the girls almost hurt. I was hoping it wasn't wishful thinking and they weren't really that full. Hubby suckled and suckled and still didn't get them completely empty before the boys were banging on the door waiting for us. It is hard to explain to the almost three year old that we really do get to spend time alone.

An hour later, I expressed big streaming squirts. It was good to know that the girls really are producing. I don't really want to delay like that, I know it will production in the long run, but it is fun to see.

a bit more

Well, here we are. Week 8. Hard to believe it has been that long...

Today I had to work, so I snuck into the bathroom with my ipod. I work where there are not a lot of staff, but there are a ton of people who come and go all day. So, at any time, people drop in to see me and they would notice if I was in the bathroom for 20 minutes! I try to time my quite time around when I don't really expect to see anyone.

I take my ipod so that I have something to listen to and it helps me mark time. I know that if I listen to a couple of songs, it hasn't been that long. I have come to really enjoy my nipples and taking this time to take care of the girls is one of my favorite parts of the day. And then today! I didn't know if my right side was ever going to stop dripping. It just kept coming and that hasn't happended before, not to this degree. It wasn't a ton of milk, but definately more. I was shocked and couldn't wait to let my husband know. I had to work late, so by the time I got home I was ready for him. They didn't hurt, I don't have that much milk, but they just felt ready. He suckled forever, we do try to make sure he suckles for awhile after the milk is gone and I kept asking, "is there still milk?". There isn't a constant flow, or really enough for a gulp, but I love to listen to him swollow. It is heaven.