FOURTEEN WEEKS

It is fourteen weeks today. i am missing my Love, it is woodworkers night, so he is away. i am also sorry to say that my breasts aren't as full as they should be today. We are going through some changes, stretching our relationship and ourselves. It has been fantastic, but also scary. With the scary, less milk. i did get hardly anything out today with my fingers. My Love called when i was trying this afternoon (because i emailed him and asked him to). It did help to hear his voice, but still didn't get much. He told me to relax and he would take good care of them and me as soon as he got home. yay me!!

Getting Back on Track

Vacation time is good, but it is also good to get back on our schedule. Finding time to be together is easier when we are in our groove. This week was good, but we missed our first morning session! Hubby's alarm didn't go off and we woke up after he should have been leaving. So, another day of me taking care of the girls.

We haven't had an increase in supply like we would like, but I am sure that is due more to our being off schedule and not taking enough time when we are together. There is always milk there, even just an hour after he has had a good long suckle, I get a squirt of milk if I try. We both enjoy the time together and I am just going to have to trust that when hubby decides he wants big mouthfuls of milk, he will up our sessions. Until then, I am going to just sit back and enjoy the time we do have together...even if it isn't as much as I would like. :)

On another note, he said that I am going to kill him this week. My sex drive has officially overtaken his, for the first time in our relationship. Usually, lately, I have started something with him, a bj or handjob and he has said, again, really? Then we suckle and by then I am so ready for him, I masturbate or ask for his fingers....yada, yada, yada a few minutes later, he is ready too! But last night, I even had my ass in the air, swaying back and forth and he said no! Later, he said he that it was more fun to tease me and turn me down!! Certainly, a first, but this morning he couldn't wait any longer. :)

Ups and Downs

We went away to a cabin in the woods for a couple of nights this week. I was thinking it would lead to more couple time, not less! Bad timing and having my in-laws around didn't help. Hubby has a stuffy nose and is finding suckling hard for any length of time. So, I spent more time alone with the girls then I do usually when we are both working! Ha, ha, so much for plans.

So, I think that supply is a bit down this week, the girls don't feel as tight. Hubby doesn't like to dissappoint, so he says it isn't, but I don't believe him. Oh well! Next week we will be back on schedule and I am sure we will just progress from here.

We have found that the backyard is a good alternitive to a hot house...suckling under the stars and a bright moon is amazing. Glad the bugs aren't too bad right now. :)

Eleven WEEKS

We have settled into a good routine, mornings, home from work and bed time. I am not a morning person, but I have been waking up before the alarm, ready for him to suckle. I love waking him up by rubbing a ready nipple over his lips and I am happy to say he is always ready to comply. I think I am craving it more then he does. Summer is so busy, and we missed the afterwork time yesterday, I was home late and he had somewhere to be. I don't mind my mid-morning break, but I don't like having to do it when it is his turn...

I did order a manual pump. I wasn't going to and I am not planning on using it a ton, but he leaves for over nights and I think that I might like to have it then. It was recommended on ANRSpace and I got it cheap on E-Bay. I am curious to see if I get very much with it. I never did with my boys expressing at work. But expressing at work sucks. Or doesn't ? (ha, ha). I hated doing it, I hated dealing with it and I missed my baby. This is different, so maybe it will work better.

I had really expected the post activities to begin to decrease, and they have a little bit. It isn't the same, new and so stimulating, but I am still finding myself ready for him once or twice a day... So, all in all, about the same there, too. It is different somehow. Not new, but just how we are now. More like is has always been this way. Wonder if it will always?

Questions my Husband will Grow Tired of

Do my boobs look bigger?
Do they feel heavy to you?
They feel heavy to me, do you think so?
Can you tell I am not wearing a bra?
Are you ready to suckle now?

As he is suckling (I try to ask yes or no, but sometimes I forget...)
Is there milk?
Is it sweet?
Does it taste like it did with the boys?
How much is there?
Is there a lot?
Is it a good amount?
Do you want there to be more?
How long do you think it will take for more milk?
Is she empty?
Did you suckle after she was empty?

Feeling Full

I had CPR training ALL day about and hour and a half away from home for work. Since it was an all day group activity, I didn't get the chance to take care of my girls, like I normally would during the work day. Let me tell you by the time I was doing chest compressions, my girls were so big and hard, it wasn't easy! When I finally got home and peeled off my bra, the girls almost hurt. I was hoping it wasn't wishful thinking and they weren't really that full. Hubby suckled and suckled and still didn't get them completely empty before the boys were banging on the door waiting for us. It is hard to explain to the almost three year old that we really do get to spend time alone.

An hour later, I expressed big streaming squirts. It was good to know that the girls really are producing. I don't really want to delay like that, I know it will production in the long run, but it is fun to see.

a bit more

Well, here we are. Week 8. Hard to believe it has been that long...

Today I had to work, so I snuck into the bathroom with my ipod. I work where there are not a lot of staff, but there are a ton of people who come and go all day. So, at any time, people drop in to see me and they would notice if I was in the bathroom for 20 minutes! I try to time my quite time around when I don't really expect to see anyone.

I take my ipod so that I have something to listen to and it helps me mark time. I know that if I listen to a couple of songs, it hasn't been that long. I have come to really enjoy my nipples and taking this time to take care of the girls is one of my favorite parts of the day. And then today! I didn't know if my right side was ever going to stop dripping. It just kept coming and that hasn't happended before, not to this degree. It wasn't a ton of milk, but definately more. I was shocked and couldn't wait to let my husband know. I had to work late, so by the time I got home I was ready for him. They didn't hurt, I don't have that much milk, but they just felt ready. He suckled forever, we do try to make sure he suckles for awhile after the milk is gone and I kept asking, "is there still milk?". There isn't a constant flow, or really enough for a gulp, but I love to listen to him swollow. It is heaven.

Week 7

Here we are, week 7.

Not much to report, still same old, same old :) Still suckling 3x a day and hand expressing once, usually. I woke my husband up for some attention at four this morning, I hate to be awake alone. He only did one side before we both drifted back off, but that is now my favorite way to go to sleep, with him suckling. I am surprised to say that our "after" suckling activities also haven't diminished. Once a day for 7 weeks is definitely a record, for us.

Needless to say, I was hoping for more milk by now. 7 weeks. But time has gone by pretty quickly. Hubby had no idea it has been that long.

First Stream

I was really hoping the extra suckling would "pay off" and to my surprise, I think it did! When I had my alone time today, I got two little squirts on the side that isn't as generous and a real stream of milk on the "good girl" side! I couldn't believe it, except that I could see where all that milk landed! Too bad hubby was at work and missed it, but he said there was still quite a bit there later.

Progress is good!!

Lovely Weekend

We had such a nice extended weekend, hubby even stayed home an extra day, so we had lots of time together over the last few days. Being home together for so long, we found extra time to suckle and I am feeling it today. The girls feel full and a bit itchy. I hope that means extra milk when I get home tonight! We are creeping up on week 6 and I am hoping that we see an increase in supply, there has been extra demand!

Wish us luck.

Night Away

I spent my first night away from my husband since beginning our re-lactation. It was a goofy day and we didn't get to have very much time together before I left. I was hoping that after not suckling for 18 hours, the girls would be full and ready. I was disappointed that wasn't the case. I know it was probably wishful thinking anyway, but grrrr. I didn't drink my nomal amount of water, since other beverages were being served and apparently rum and coke doesn't work the same as water. I woke up alone and a bit hung over, but not as full as I was expecting.

Oh, well. I shouldn't be so impatient, I know there are a lot of women who have been doing this longer and haven't had the results we have had so far, but still! I just can't wait for really full, milky breasts.

"Post" Activities

My husband and I have been together for almost 14 years, he was only 17 when we started our relationship, I was 19. We have really grown together sexually. I was his first ever and he gave me my first "o". Our first 6 years together, we lived about 2 hours apart during the school year and at our parent's homes the rest of the time. We really didn't have quality time to spend together and I remember dreaming about just being able to wake up in his arms every day and I try to remember that feeling now, 8 years in to marriage. We did have some weekends together and some of our fondest memeories are from his first apartment at school. He didn't have any roommates and we discovered a lot about sex then.

I have to say, those used to be the "high" points of our sexual relationship, crazy weekend sex, trying to make up for all the time we were apart during the week. I can't say that that is still the "high".

Since begining our ANR, we have had sex at least once a day (except when I was on my cycle, I don't have intercourse then, but he still got attention each day). It has been crazy, we cannot get enough of eachother. Before, he would liken getting me "ready" to starting a car, if I was too "cold" and took too long to get going, it was because I hadn't been started enough lately (not enough sex). Now, I am always ready. I feel so much closer to him, and of couse it makes sense, we make sure to be together a few times a day, we are bound to feel closer, but I really had no idea that would be a result in our suckling time.

Week Four

Orginally posted on ANRSpace

I haven’t blogged about our progress in awhile, because I didn’t really think there was anything to say. We are now in week four and still suckling 3x a day and once a day I hand express. I do drink some Mother’s Milk tea, it is really yummy with a little honey. We have fallen in to a nice rhythm and love the morning and evening times together. Right after work is really hard, the kids are so excited to see Daddy that they don’t like to have to share him with me. It has made us very creative over the last few weeks!

Anyway, after reading the last thing I wrote, there has been progress…my milk is building slowly and in direct relationship to how much water I drink. I can’t believe how dry my mouth gets during the day! Hubby now does get to swallow some milk and I almost always get a little squirt on both sides during the day. The milky drops have started to run a bit and there are more from different ducts (a new one this morning!) I am glad that I have been writing down how things are going, it makes me realize how far we have come in just a few weeks. I have been going braless as much as possible, even out and about (with a coat on), the girls are much fuller these days. It is a great feeling and something I never did before. I think it helps with production (the girls don’t like to be held down too long).

Along the way

Originally posted on ANRSpace

It has been a few days since my first little squirt and I am happy to say it wasn’t a fluke. I am now getting a little squirt from both girls when I hand express around noon. There isn’t a lot, but it is so nice to have progress. Maybe it will be enough to keep me satisfied for awhile…maybe. I still can’t believe how full the girls feel before he suckles and how flat they are after, while he says he doesn’t really get a lot. I know, it shows things are changing, but it still doesn’t make sense to me.

I love the closeness we are sharing these days. I have always been a bit of an attention whore (pay attention to me, now!). I hate it when he is gone or just too busy. Since we have begun this journey, it has been nice to know I really am on his mind and in his thoughts all day. We are together three times a day and we are making each other the priority, above all, and that is new to us (even sneaking home for lunch once a week, I am afraid the neighbors are going to notice). It is hard with the juggle day-to-day life, with work and kids. So far, we are making it work and I hope as days become busier, we will still find the time. Mornings and nights work just fine, it is the stolen moments during the day. I am grateful for the nice weather, it has worked well just to kick the kids out side! Hard to believe all of these changes have occurred just over the last few weeks.

Feeling a bit stuck

Originally posted on ANRSpace

I was so excited that we had drops within the first week of suckling. I was surprised at our quick progress, but now that we are still there a week later, I am a little let down...ha ha.
I just get milky drops that are content to stay on my nipples, not wanting to run or grow. I know it is asking too much, but I was hoping for a bit more progress, a week later. Oh, well, I will learn to be patient.
On a lighter note, we are starting to settle into a lovely routine, one that we both enjoy. We are waking up early to not have to rush our suckling and we both even fell asleep during for the first time. It was heavenly to be woken up by him begining again. Lucky girl! Hopefully, I'll be able to report a bit more progress soon.

First Ever Blog

Posted on ANRSpace

So, as a newbie at trying to re-lactate, milkmaid recommended journaling to keep track of how things go. We have been trying to re-lactate my dry girls for about 10 days, suckling (or hand expressing) 4x a day. It seems to be progressing, we have had drops since Friday, at least once a day. That sure makes me want to keep going! Today, I didn't have to work, so I spent way too much time on-line and reading. It is amazing to me how generous and welcoming so many people have been on this site and some others. I have learned A LOT in just a few days. My husband was really the instigator, but since I don't wade quietly into anything I do, I have spent some quality time learning.
Goal! I want to blog every few days to keep track of our progression. Today I read up on hand expressing since I do have to go to work some of the time! I practiced and had good results in just a few minutes (drops on both sides!!). I made my husband watch the video and me to see if it looked like I was getting it right...what an overachiever!
Anyway, we are very excited about what suckling has done for us already, it is so new and fun that it is on the brain all the time. I am sure after some of the new-ness falls away, I'll be able to think of something else (I just hope that doesn't happen too soon).